Harnessing Solution-Focused Self-Care for a Healthier Mindset

Chris Zhang
Aug 30
4 min read

Dedicating time to your self-care is not a selfish act—it is a form of self-preservation. It is a crucial investment in your mental, emotional, and physical well-being. Engaging in self-care empowers you to better manage life’s stresses, sustain your health, and lead a life with greater balance and fulfillment. Prioritizing self-care is an expression of self-respect that benefits not only you but also those around you.

In caregiving and helping professions, the cultural emphasis is often placed on extending compassion to others, sometimes at the expense of caring for ourselves. The ongoing mental health crisis has demanded extraordinary resilience from clinicians, educators, and healthcare professionals. During these challenging times, attending to your own needs becomes more than helpful—it’s essential. Solution-focused techniques can support this process (Mache et al., 2016). Self-care involves deliberately choosing actions that sustain and enhance your health, such as exercise, mindfulness, balanced nutrition, social connection, routine medical care, and setting personal boundaries.

Cultivating Self-Care: Blossoming Into A Self-Determined Life

Imagine engaging in a meaningful conversation with yourself. Use the following reflection prompts to gain deeper appreciation for who you are, how you care for yourself, and how you advocate for your needs in a self-respectful and protective way.

What do I most appreciate about myself? What else?
What am I most proud of in how I’ve supported my well-being? What else?
What have I done this past year, month, week, and today to sustain or improve my well-being—physically, mentally, and emotionally? What else?
What have been the most effective strategies I’ve used to take care of myself? What else?
Who might notice that I am caring for myself? Who else?
What would they appreciate about me prioritizing my well-being? What else?
Has my self-care changed over time, or have I always prioritized it?
How was it helpful for me to care for myself? In what other ways?
How did I choose to take action on behalf of my well-being?

Consider these areas of your life and rate yourself from 1-10 (10 = excellent, 1 = struggling):

How well have I nurtured myself through kind self-talk, enjoyable activities, and supportive relationships?
How consistently have I maintained my physical health—through movement, medical care, and sleep?
How satisfied am I with the boundaries I set for myself?
How fulfilling are my personal relationships?
Have I created space for creative or generative outlets that enrich me?
If my loved ones rated my ability to care for myself, what would they say (1-10)?
Is their number different from mine? Why?

Working the Scale

What number feels “good enough” right now?
What’s keeping it from being lower? What else?
What’s one small action I could take to raise my number by even a single point?
How confident am I (1-10) that I’ll take that step?
Is my level of confidence good enough?

Solution-Focused Self-Compassion

Self-compassion means treating yourself with the same empathy and concern you'd offer a good friend. It’s the desire to soothe and support yourself through life’s pain, rather than criticize or blame. Many professionals are conditioned to care deeply for others while neglecting themselves. Practicing self-compassion helps you foster acceptance rather than self-judgment.

Research shows self-compassion is associated with less anxiety and depression, improved coping skills, stronger interpersonal relationships, and overall well-being (MacBeth & Gumley, 2012; Neff & Dahm, 2015). Cultivating self-compassion involves learning how to approach difficult emotions with gentleness, appreciate your own efforts to cope, and harness your emotional responses—even the painful ones—to support growth and resilience.

Practice Exercise: Reflecting on the Three Elements of Self-Compassion

Kristin Neff (2003) identifies three components of self-compassion: Kindness, Common Humanity, and Mindfulness. Reflect on these in your life:

Kindness:

What does being kind to myself look like?
What nurturing things have I done or said to myself recently?
Who might notice when I am being kind to myself? What would they see?

If you were writing to a dear friend in distress, what caring words or actions would you offer?

Common Humanity:

What do I value about the shared human experience?
How do I act when I recognize others share similar struggles?
What universal emotions or challenges do I relate to in others—grief, joy, love, fear, failure?

Mindfulness:

What helps me remain open to the present without judgment?
How do I approach discomfort or difficult emotions with curiosity and care?
What else has helped me develop mindful awareness?

Solution-Focused 10-Minute Time

When facing emotional overwhelm, breaking time down into smaller units—like 10 minutes—can be incredibly grounding. Coping doesn't always mean feeling good; sometimes, tolerable is enough. If 10 minutes feels too long or short, find the time frame that feels manageable for you.

PAST 10-Minute Time

Use "for me" statements to validate your experience: “It was painful for me to navigate uncertainty around my job. ”“It was overwhelming for me to care for a sick loved one.”

Ask yourself:

What made things even slightly more bearable in that time?
What actions helped—even if small?
Who would’ve noticed a difference in me?
What would they have seen?

FUTURE 10-Minute Time

What do I know will help make the next 10 minutes more manageable?
What small actions can I take?
Who would notice?
What would they see me doing?

Scaling Confidence:

On a scale from 1 to 10, how confident am I that I can take a step to support myself?
What keeps the number from being lower?
What will I do differently when the number rises by one point?

How Psychotherapy May Help

Psychotherapy—particularly solution-focused or compassion-based therapies—can provide a structured, supportive environment to explore your needs, define your goals, and develop a personalized strategy for sustained self-care. A skilled therapist can help you clarify what already works, amplify your strengths, and cultivate a more balanced view of yourself. Therapy also offers a safe space to build self-compassion, work through resistance to caring for yourself, and find meaning even during painful times.

Therapists can support you in:

Identifying what success looks like in various areas of life
Developing confidence in your ability to take action
Challenging self-critical narratives and increasing emotional resilience
Practicing mindfulness and empathic self-reflection

You don’t have to do this alone. Therapy can be a powerful step toward healing, growth, and living a self-determined life—anchored in compassion and care, for both others and yourself.

References

Solution-focused self care. SolutionFocused Therapy Institute. (2024, August 12). https://solutionfocused.net/solution-focused-self-care/