Social Anxiety: Understanding the Fear of Social Situations in Markham

Social anxiety often feels like being in the spotlight, but with the right support, it can be managed.

Feeling nervous in social situations is something almost everyone can relate to. In fact, around 90% of people admit they’ve felt shy at some point in their lives. For most, this is a normal part of being human. But when the fear of being judged becomes overwhelming and starts interfering with daily life, it may point to social anxiety disorder.

As therapists here in Markham, we often see how social anxiety can hold people back from living the life they want—whether that’s avoiding school presentations, work meetings, or even social gatherings with friends. Left untreated, it can impact relationships, career opportunities, and self-esteem.

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What Is Social Anxiety?

Social anxiety disorder (also called social phobia) is more than shyness. It’s an intense fear of being judged negatively or not coming across well to others. For many, this means avoiding social situations altogether, or going through them with extreme stress. Some people describe feeling like they are “on stage,” with everyone watching and evaluating them, even when that’s not really the case.

Why Social Anxiety Happens

When social anxiety shows up, it’s usually because the brain is perceiving a social threat. This often looks like:

• Fearing embarrassment or awkwardness

• Worrying about being boring or uninteresting

• Believing others will notice flaws or mistakes

This “social threat” is made up of two parts:

• Probability – how likely your fear is to happen

• Cost – how bad you believe it would be if it did happen

People with social anxiety tend to overestimate both, which makes situations feel scarier than they really are.

What Keeps Social Anxiety Going

Research shows six factors that maintain social anxiety:

1. Negative thoughts about yourself or others

2. Avoiding social situations

3. Using safety behaviours (like over-rehearsing what you’ll say)

4. Focusing too much on yourself or the environment

5. Worrying about how you appear to others

6. Holding onto negative core beliefs (e.g., “I’m boring” or “I’m not good enough”)

These patterns may provide short-term relief, but in the long run they reinforce the cycle of anxiety and make it harder to break free.

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Moving Forward

The good news is that social anxiety can be treated. By working on these maintaining factors, people can learn to reduce fear, build confidence, and reconnect with the social life they want. Therapy can help identify unhelpful thought patterns, challenge negative beliefs, and practice gradual exposure to social situations in a safe and supportive way.

If you’re in Markham and struggling with social anxiety, know that you’re not alone. Reaching out to a therapist can be the first step toward change. With the right support, you can learn strategies to manage social anxiety, feel more at ease in social situations, and move closer to the life you want to live.

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References

Bank, S., Burgess, M., Sng, A., Summers, M., Campbell, B., & McEvoy, P. (2020). Stepping Out of Social Anxiety: Module 1 – Understanding Social Anxiety. Perth, Western Australia: Centre for Clinical Interventions.