Growing Stronger Together: How to Build Trust in Relationships

Sakshi Kaur
Jul 18
5 min read

Five people are standing outdoors, hugging in a group. Trees with orange and yellow leaves are visible in the background, indicating fall.

Trust is what makes friendships and family bonds strong. It means you believe someone will be honest, kind, and keep their promises. When you trust someone, you feel safe to share your thoughts and feelings. But trust isn’t something that just happens. It needs to be built carefully, like stacking blocks one by one. Without trust, relationships can feel scary, tense, or fake.

We all want strong, happy connections with the people we care about. So how do we build trust? And what if trust has been broken before? A type of therapy called Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) can help us learn and practice trust skills.

Understanding Trust

Trust means you believe someone is telling you the truth, treating you with care, and doing what they say they will do. For example, you trust a friend to keep your secret or a parent to pick you up on time. Trust makes us feel safe and close to others.

But trust can be fragile. If someone lies, breaks promises, or treats us badly, it’s harder to trust them again. That’s why learning how to build trust is so important. It helps us make better friendships, get along with family, and even work well with teachers or classmates (Dialectical Behavior Therapy, n.d.).

DBT: A Helpful Tool for Building Trust

Dialectical Behavior Therapy, or DBT, is a type of counseling that teaches people skills to handle big feelings and have healthier relationships. One of these skills is called “Trust in Relationships.” DBT explains that trust is built through three important steps: being honest, being respectful and understanding, and being consistent (Dialectical Behavior Therapy, n.d.).

Being Honest

Being honest means telling the truth, even if it feels hard. Instead of making up excuses, you share what really happened. For example, if you forgot to do homework, you might say, “I didn’t plan well and I’m sorry.”

Honesty shows you respect the other person enough to be real with them. It also shows that you have nothing to hide. When you tell the truth over and over, people start to believe they can count on what you say. Being honest helps others feel safe opening up to you too (Dialectical Behavior Therapy, n.d.).

Being Respectful and Understanding

Respect and understanding are key parts of trust. Being respectful means you listen carefully and use kind words, even when you’re upset. It means you don’t shout, call names, or make fun of someone’s ideas.

Understanding means trying to see things from the other person’s point of view. Even if you don’t agree, you can say, “I see why you’re upset” or “That must have been hard.” This makes people feel heard and valued. When someone feels safe sharing with you, they’re more likely to trust you (Dialectical Behavior Therapy, n.d.).

Being Consistent

Consistency means you do what you say you’ll do, over and over. If you promise to help clean up, you actually do it. If you say you’ll call a friend, you really call.

Consistency proves you’re reliable. It shows you mean what you say. Over time, this helps trust grow, like watering a plant every day so it grows strong. When people see you keeping your word, they know they can depend on you (Dialectical Behavior Therapy, n.d.).

Why These Steps Matter

These three steps work together to make relationships stronger. When you’re honest, people know you’re real. When you’re respectful and understanding, people feel safe. When you’re consistent, people know they can rely on you.

Even small actions matter. Saying hello with a smile, listening without interrupting, and keeping little promises all build trust slowly over time. It’s like stacking blocks, one on top of another, until you have a strong tower.

How Psychotherapy Can Help Build Trust

Sometimes trust feels really hard. Maybe someone broke your trust before by lying or being mean. Maybe you made mistakes yourself and want to do better. This is where psychotherapy, talking with a trained counselor, can help.

In therapy, you can learn DBT trust skills step by step. A therapist might teach you how to be more honest in a kind way, how to really listen to others, or how to keep promises better. They might practice conversations with you to help you get better at it (Linehan, 2015).

Therapy is a safe place to practice new skills. You can make mistakes without worrying about being judged. Your therapist will give you tips on how to improve. It’s like training for real-life conversations so you feel more ready.

Understanding Why Trust Is Hard

Therapy also helps you figure out why trust might feel scary. Maybe you’ve been bullied, lied to, or hurt before. Talking about these experiences helps you understand your feelings and start to heal. You learn that while some people may not be trustworthy, many people are, and you can learn to tell the difference (Linehan, 2015).

Repairing Broken Trust

If trust has been broken in an important relationship, like with family or close friends, therapy can help both people talk it through. A therapist can guide you to say sorry, listen better, and set new rules so the problem doesn’t happen again. This is called repair work, and it can even make the relationship stronger than before (Linehan, 2015).

Little Steps Make a Big Difference

Building trust doesn’t need big, dramatic gestures. It grows from small, daily actions. Telling the truth about little things, listening carefully, and keeping small promises all matter. Over time, these actions show people they can rely on you.

You can start today. Try being honest with someone about how you feel. Listen to a friend without interrupting. Follow through on something you said you’d do. Every time you practice, you’re building trust like adding another block to your tower.

Conclusion: Growing Stronger Together

Trust is what makes relationships feel safe and real. It lets us share who we truly are without fear. But trust doesn’t just appear, it’s built carefully with honesty, respect, and consistency.

DBT offers simple steps anyone can learn to build trust, and psychotherapy gives us a safe place to practice those steps and heal old hurts. With help and practice, anyone can become more trustworthy and grow stronger, healthier relationships.

So remember: be honest, be respectful, be consistent, and watch trust grow like a strong, healthy tree that can last a lifetime.

References

Dialectical Behavior Therapy. (n.d.). Trust in relationships: Couples and individuals. Retrieved from https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/interpersonal-effectiveness/trust-in-relationships/

Linehan, M. M. (2015). DBT skills training manual (2nd ed.). New York, NY: Guilford Press.